Hope everyone Has a Happy Thanksgiving!!
now on to my pity party
Another year is about to come to an end. This year has brought back some emotions I thought I had buried deep inside of me. I cant believe that it has been 5 years since Bill passed away. I would love to say time flys when you are having fun but, I haven't had much fun. It has been a big struggle. You can only imagine how lonely I feel some days. I miss having someone next to me or having someone to talk to. Someone to help with the boys and just the day to day stuff. I had to walk passed the intensive care unit today and there were 3 people standing outside crying and I had a big flash back. I wanted to reach out to them and tell them I know what they are going through. However there are no words that you can say to anyone in that position. Everyone thinks they will have that one magic word that will make you feel better. I think even now there is no magic word to help with how I feel. It is like having a hole in your soul. I just want to get through this holiday season. I know I sound depressed but I am just VERY LONELY!! I will some how find a way out of my funk. It may take a while but I know someday I will be in a different state of mind.
On a positive note I lost 3.8 pounds making it a total of 23.8 for the last 8 weeks.
5 comments:
I can imagine that loneliness. I feel ya! Not that I have any words of cure. Sometimes, for me anyway, I didn't want anyone to try to fix it. Just let me marinate in my misery for awhile. Not in the mood to cheer up yet. If you need a good cry, watch "My Sergei". I bawl every darn time. Sometimes that feels cleansing and kind of resets the mood button for me. Guess you'll find your own way. Good luck.
Sorry you are having such a rough time right now sis. Don't know what to tell you. Do you have friends to visit that have kids your boys are friends with besides Becky and Paula? What about your church? Does it have a singles group? Just some things to think about.
Congratulations on your weight loss. You are doing so good!
Love you sis!
"It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." (That's comin' from my own pity party book of quotes. I'm there for ya, babe!!)
i was thinking about you the other day when i was lonely myself... because i think the loneliness would be that much more severe if i were actually missing an individual... wish i could hug you. i love ya.
Post a Comment